The 25 before 25 List...

Well, I got through as much of my 25 before 25 list as the time (less than a year) would allow, but even though I didn't get through the entire list, I'm not sweating it. The whole purpose of the list was for me to get out of my comfort zone, and I can say it definitely did that. At times I forgot about the list because instead of it being about things to-do, it began to serve more as a guideline, a mindset even: just get out there and do it.

And I did. Never in a million years did I think I would find myself taking on ballet, because I thought I was "past my prime," or taking Italian because "my brain suffered enough in college and it's so much harder than Spanish," or all the other things on and off the list that I got done. I've learned to be a bit more spontaneous (still working on not being stuck to my schedule so much) and I love just going out and doing things, often without thinking twice about it, and I truly believe that this undertaking has definitely helped me ease into 25 just nicely.

completed: • perfect making macarons • go one month without shopping for clothes • do a typically group thing alone • begin the conversational Italian class • hold plank for a full minute •complete the Whole 30 • purchase personalized stationery • spend one full day doing only touristy things • wear something that is out of my comfort zone • attend a cooking class • take a group dance or fitness class • read 5 books from the BBC classics list • learn more about photography and buy a dslr • eat at 5 new places in NYC •                     

My only regret is that I had not thought of doing this last year, because I really had so much fun making the list (I really just love making lists) and crossing things off after completion. If you've ever thought of making one of these lists, whether it be for a birthday or over time, I highly recommend it. It really was a great experience, and I'm already thinking of making another list. I did have a 30 before 30 list started, but I'm thinking maybe I will give a 101 things in 1001 days a go. Can I even think of 101 things to do, let alone count 1001 days from now? Probably to the former, absolutely not to the latter. I've started the list here.

original image source

What Not To Say To The Unemployed Post-Grad.

I've lost count of how long it's been since graduation. Sike, it's been 1 year, 3 months and 10 days. 

Prior to graduation, I knew the state of the job market (although, I didn't anticipate it would take this long...), so I had a backup plan. I thought often about my plan b, as it was actually my dream job. It was a job I knew I was qualified for and I was even assured by those that knew about it that I would get it. After spending a month working on the application and submitting my resume, I was informed two weeks later that while I was "a strong candidate" and that my application was "extremely impressive," I was not an exact match.

I absolutely dread hearing this from employers. Not because I can't take rejection (nothing like job hunting to toughen you up!), but because on the rare occasion that I do hear back from an employer, this is what they always say and to this day, I still have no idea what it means exactly.

But the words that I dread the most are the ones from friends/family/strangers. The ones that think they know it all and feel the need to offer up their unsolicited "advice." I talk open and freely about post-grad life when I'm ready (like today!), but there are times and certain people, that make it a conversation I much prefer not to have.

Despite all that, the last few months have given me a grand list of commentary, some of them real gems. Here are some of my favorites.

What NOT to Say (or Do) to the Un/Underemployed Post-Grad In Your Life.

Did you really just say that? (gif via realitytvgifs.com)

 "You'll get a job one of these days." 

Well, I sure hope so! I'd hate to think I spent all that time and money going to school for nothing.

"You should already have a job with that degree!"
I should, yet here we are.

"Don't be upset. You're not the only one." 

Given that I was not the only person to graduate in 2012 NO. DUH! I am well aware that there are many others in the same situation, but that does not change the fact that I feel stuck and unsure.  

Do not feel sorry for me.
Given the problems that I could have, I am truly grateful that this all I have to deal with, and I thank God that things are not worse. Save the sentiment for a time when I may really need it. 

"The job market is not that bad!"
Really?

"Are you looking hard enough? Have you tried X,Y or Z?"
Once in a blue moon, someone will suggest something that I have not tried yet. Other than that, I have. Trust me. I've done just about everything but sell my soul.

"So-and-so got a job prior to graduation!"
Good. For. Them.

Do not abandon me.

This has been one of the hardest and weirdest parts of unemployment to deal with. Aren't friends supposed to be there no matter what? Given the fact that things are so uncertain at the moment, unemployment really could happen to anyone.

"In my day..."
I will cut you off Step Brothers-style right there. Just don't.

Do not be afraid to mention it. 
Ironic, huh? The truth is, once you are not insulting me or making empty statements, I don't mind if you ask how I'm doing or how the job search is going.  It's all about the approach, and once you are being genuine, it's all good and greatly appreciated. I promise I won't burst into tears or rip your head off :)

If you are or have been in the same situation, what are/were some of the comments from others that you've had to endure?

Life Post Grad: One Year Later

Then | The best thing about this picture? The guy in the pink shirt in the back.

Today, May the 15th, officially marks one year since graduation. Three hundred and sixty five days. Twelve months. 

Where did the time go?

There was a part of me that was nervous for this day to come. No, actually I was dreading this day. I was scared this day would come and go and I would still be in the same situation: jobless and searching. This fear was accelerated a few weeks ago during my spring cleaning extravaganza when I came across my diploma in my closet and freaked out...a bit. I removed it from the shelf and gave it to my Dad with specific instructions: "Put this away before I burn it."

OF COURSE I would never actually burn my diploma-I worked too hard and went through way too much to get it. But seeing it brought about so many negative emotions. While I have been mostly positive in the last year, any emotion I had felt at some point during the last few months came rushing forward. Frustration from the many rejection letters telling me I'm a completely qualified candidate, but that there are no positions available at the moment. Regret for not doing XYZ during undergrad, even though XYZ was usually impossible. The feeling of failure because at 18 I thought I would graduate, have a job, and be on my way to owning my own business by the time I was 30. (That was one of many life plans. The other involved becoming an MTV VJ...) Then the "comparison anxiety" began. How come friend A has a job and not me? I know her GPA and qualifications were definitely not better than mine. If only had friend B's connections. I probably should have transferred to a bigger school like friend C. On and on and on and on.

Now | GPOY

I'm grateful that as I have gotten older, I've become wiser and know that while my feelings may be warranted, they are usually not true, and don't define me in any way. I'm also grateful that I have such an amazing support system, especially my parents, and friends A, B, and C. More than that, knowing that I am not alone in this situation is definitely a relief. Talking with friends and others that have been through it puts it all into perspective that "Hey,you're not a failure! You're just in the midst of a super crappy job market."

While the current hiring situation is out of my control, one thing I am in control of is my future. This last year has not just made me stronger, but has been one of the greatest learning experiences of my life so far. What I never understood in Accounting and Excel during undergrad (and called hieroglyphics,) is almost second nature to me now. I've become semi-conversational in Italian (parli appena lentamente per favore), I've discovered so many new places in my beautiful city, and I've picked up some fun new hobbies. More importantly I am dreaming bigger and taking things into my own hands. I've started expanding my jewelry locally and on Etsy and I'm 99.99% sure that that venture I briefly mentioned here, is becoming a reality and I am starting my own business.  Does this mean I am completely giving up on the job search? Absolutely not. But am I going to try and pursue a few of my own dreams in the mean time. Absafreakinglutely.

I am happy that with each new day, I can see my vision of where I want to be down the road, and how I want to get there. I don't know what's to come, but I'm excited. I just know that when I look back at this post in a years time I will think, "that was only the beginning."

Burnt out.

Relaxing is something that doesn't always come easy to me. Instead of taking a minute to just chill, I sometimes find myself using that minute to "be more productive" when I should be using it to preserve my sanity.

Fortunately for me yesterday, I wasn't feeling well. At. All. I don't know if it's a result of the time change or the beginnings of a cold, but I was feeling less than stellar. I say fortunately, because while my "condition" was less than ideal, I was forced to rest, instead of powering through it like I normally would. I normally can't take a nap, but I took the most amazing nap yesterday, and have been feeling better since then.

All of this has taught me that while my to-do list is a great priority, I need to put myself at the top of that  list and make it a point to slow down and relax, especially if my body is telling me to do so.

So that's it from me. I'm now off to Trader Joe's & Whole Foods to pick up some items to begin my Whole 30, Target (because Target is my happy place), and Shake Shack (ironic, I know, but I want custard, so...yeah).

What helps you to relax and unwind?

Whatever Today May Mean to You:

Can I get an amen?

Owning It.

Yesterday, I headed to the Levo League offices for a live version of their bi-weekly Office Hours to see the one and only Kelly Cutrone.

image via The Levo League

One thing I don't think many people realize is that Kelly Cutrone is nice. I mean extremely nice.  When I first met her a few years ago at Fashion's Night Out, I couldn't get over how incredibly kind she was. If you've read her books, you will come to find out that while she may have a tough love style, she is not this monster that people try and make her out to be.