What Not To Say To The Unemployed Post-Grad.


I've lost count of how long it's been since graduation. Sike, it's been 1 year, 3 months and 10 days. 

Prior to graduation, I knew the state of the job market (although, I didn't anticipate it would take this long...), so I had a backup plan. I thought often about my plan b, as it was actually my dream job. It was a job I knew I was qualified for and I was even assured by those that knew about it that I would get it. After spending a month working on the application and submitting my resume, I was informed two weeks later that while I was "a strong candidate" and that my application was "extremely impressive," I was not an exact match.

I absolutely dread hearing this from employers. Not because I can't take rejection (nothing like job hunting to toughen you up!), but because on the rare occasion that I do hear back from an employer, this is what they always say and to this day, I still have no idea what it means exactly.

But the words that I dread the most are the ones from friends/family/strangers. The ones that think they know it all and feel the need to offer up their unsolicited "advice." I talk open and freely about post-grad life when I'm ready (like today!), but there are times and certain people, that make it a conversation I much prefer not to have.

Despite all that, the last few months have given me a grand list of commentary, some of them real gems. Here are some of my favorites.

What NOT to Say (or Do) to the Un/Underemployed Post-Grad In Your Life.

Did you really just say that? (gif via realitytvgifs.com)

 "You'll get a job one of these days." 
Well, I sure hope so! I'd hate to think I spent all that time and money going to school for nothing.

"You should already have a job with that degree!"
I should, yet here we are.

"Don't be upset. You're not the only one." 
Given that I was not the only person to graduate in 2012 NO. DUH! I am well aware that there are many others in the same situation, but that does not change the fact that I feel stuck and unsure.  

Do not feel sorry for me.
Given the problems that I could have, I am truly grateful that this all I have to deal with, and I thank God that things are not worse. Save the sentiment for a time when I may really need it. 

"The job market is not that bad!"

"Are you looking hard enough? Have you tried X,Y or Z?"
Once in a blue moon, someone will suggest something that I have not tried yet. Other than that, I have. Trust me. I've done just about everything but sell my soul.

"So-and-so got a job prior to graduation!"
Good. For. Them.

Do not abandon me.
This has been one of the hardest and weirdest parts of unemployment to deal with. Aren't friends supposed to be there no matter what? Given the fact that things are so uncertain at the moment, unemployment really could happen to anyone.

"In my day..."
I will cut you off Step Brothers-style right there. Just don't.

Do not be afraid to mention it. 
Ironic, huh? The truth is, once you are not insulting me or making empty statements, I don't mind if you ask how I'm doing or how the job search is going.  It's all about the approach, and once you are being genuine, it's all good and greatly appreciated. I promise I won't burst into tears or rip your head off :)

If you are or have been in the same situation, what are/were some of the comments from others that you've had to endure?

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